Vishnu Devadas- Feedback on Level 2 Workshop (2023/1)
Email- vishnudathand@gmail.com
A lot of my childhood I don’t remember. Specifically, things that shaped me. I know their severity and consequences but my head aches when I try to remember the details more than vaguely. I know how I felt the day after and ever since, but the moments themselves are hazy. I thought I moved on but really I just developed the habit of acting like it didn’t happen. I moved houses, neighborhoods, schools, friend groups, and careers to adjust for beliefs about myself that I imbibed as a result of these incidents.
In October of this year, I had the opportunity, through Vishal Nayer’s L2 Acting Workshop, to stare at and heal these parts of myself. I was joined by fellow misfits, who, just like me, decided in the bravest way to dive right into themselves and see what comes.
A lot of the time, this was absolutely terrifying. Nobody tells you what’s down there and everything life logically taught you points to there being no merit in going anywhere close to it. Logic, we learned, needed to move out the way for feeling to take charge. And feeling, we learned is the quickest way to being honest with yourself. (The point isn’t to come out of it unscathed, but to realize you were never unscathed to begin with, and that that’s okay.)
Vishal guided us comfortably through exceptionally well-structured exercises to stare at as much of ourselves as possible, and then, intentionally, allow ourselves to be that way. Acting became less about trying and more about being; about restructuring beliefs to make way for honesty, and then trusting this honesty to lead our performances. In these spaces of extreme vulnerability, I found the purest empathy and greatest courage I’ve known: To play with shame and wear fear like a dress. This is the direction I will forever head in, as an artist and human being.
Words cannot explain how much (insane) dedication, and comforting, observant guidance this needed and I can’t thank Vishal enough for continuing in Baba’s footsteps so earnestly and then pulling off this incredible feat. I got to witness this all begin with L1 at the start of the year, (where I was introduced to the craft), continue into connectologues (where I learned to apply the craft) and then top off with L2 (by which time I learned to create a method for myself). The amount of growth I witnessed here is a blessing, and the bond I share with my fellow misfits is irreplaceable.*
We now have blueprints to develop our craft and raise the bar, by creating from a place of honesty and dedicated love. Thank you so much for this
I see no greater freedom than in diving into pain and realizing that it ends somewhere. Step one Feel your way inwards. Step two Find infinite creativity and joy. Peaceful.